Lesson hard learned and time to prove myself♤

I believe that anyone can conquer fear by doing the things he fears to do …

Eleanor Roosevelt

FEAR IS JUST A 4 LETTER WORD♤

Boss says he needs me on days in a haul truck

So night shift has been going smoothly. Aside from a couple windy days the job was more a time killer. Seriously. I can’t Believe they paid me to do that job. The crew a group of men that are funny and nice enough. I dig the vibe foreal. So of course it is time to shake it up.

The pit needs material to make material and that comes from the quarry. The quarry is a beautiful and magical place where big pieces of equipment do a choreographed song and dance in order to get dirt rock and sand to the front of the pit to be sold.

Without going thru all of the last few years let me explain the drivers situation. Right now they have 3 main drivers and given all are in working order only 100 ton cat haulers run daily.

I am no longer a main driver in back for a plethora of reasons but mainly my senority pushed me out. My boss asked me to work nights in the water truck and I did. My position grew on nights. I began to run the haul truck and the water truck both in the same night. After a bit I was able to learn the water pull and plus I run our road trucks so it was apparent my job was fairly secure.

During the beginning of starting night shift and even to this day there is drama with 2 of the main drivers in haul trucks. Without telling the story I will just say this. Never ever date where you work ladies. It can turn into a nightmare as my experience truly has been.

My boss being the good guy he is has made sure I kept my job and he protected me when I could not protect myself. This ties into an article I’m currently working on [10 rules ladies should not break in construction]. Do not be afraid to take a stand. I was and I’ll regret that forever. It sets all of us back if we’re not reporting abuse.

I digress. Because of my skill set I’m called occasionally to run haul trucks in back. Since they took 2 other drivers from road trucks to run haul trucks it didn’t look as if they’d need another but my awesome boss has asked me to run for 2 weeks day shift. We need the material.

1 of the drivers is another female. She’s wonderful funny smart a great driver and my friend so I’m excited to work with her again. But my excitement is tainted with some fear. I know I’m good and I know my job so the fear is just there to push past and presevere. Those men will not intimidate me. Nor will they make me look bad. Still that little voice creeps in and says “you suck you’re not good enough you don’t belong you’re an imposter” Grrrr annoying.

Doing the work I do means I MUST appear confident in my abilities. Not only is confidence important but also being better than the guys. That’s what keeps me going fwd. Not the fastest since being fast in a big rock truck could get people killed and or cost the company greatly in parts if it breaks. These are older pieces of equipment. No need to race anyhow.

So it’s Monday and I’m in the front of the pit moving material anticipating tomorrow being one of 6 haul trucks. I will not let my fear take the joy from this job and if I’m slightly anxious I will not show it.

Hopefully this day finds all of you in good spirits. If you need advice or want to vent comments are welcome. I’m closing this with fear being nothing but a fleeting emotion that is necessary for survival. Feel it face it move on. Thanks again for reading


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